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 “Andy went in the back room awhile and came out dressed in his best clothes. There was a kind of murderous and soulful look of gentle riotousness in his eye that I didn’t like. I watched him to see what turn the whiskey was going to take in him. There are two times when you never can tell what is going to happen. One is when a man takes his first drink; and the other is when a woman takes her latest.

“In less than an hour Andy’s skate had turned to an ice yacht. He was outwardly decent and managed to preserve his aquarium, but inside he was impromptu and full of unexpectedness.

“ ‘Jeff,’ says he, ‘do you know that I’m a crater – a living crater (Джефф, ты знаешь, что я кратер, живой кратер)?’

“ ‘That’s a self-evident hypothesis (это самоочевидная гипотеза),’ says I. ‘But you’re not Irish (но ты же не ирландец). Why don’t you say ‘creature,’ according to the rules and syntax of America (почему ты не скажешь «создание», в соответствии с правилами и синтаксисом Америки; рассказчик принял “crater” за “creature”, произнесенное с ирландским акцентом: living creature – живое создание)?’

“ ‘I’m the crater of a volcano (я кратер вулкана),’ says he. ‘I’m all aflame and crammed inside with an assortment of words and phrases (я весь объят пламенем и переполнен множеством слов и фраз; flame – пламя, огонь; to cram – наполнять, набивать битком; assortment – набор, ассортимент) that have got to have an exodus (которые должны иметь выход; exodus – массовый отъезд, переселение). I can feel millions of synonyms and parts of speech rising in me (я чувствую, как миллионы синонимов и частей речи поднимаются во мне),’ says he, ‘and I’ve got to make a speech of some sort (и я должен произнести речь какого-либо рода). Drink,’ says Andy, ‘always drives me to oratory (выпивка, – говорит Энди, – всегда побуждает меня к ораторскому искусству; to drive – водить, вести /машину/; загонять /куда-л./; приводить в какое-л. состояние; oratory – риторика; красноречие; ораторское искусство).’

“ ‘It could do no worse (она не могла бы сделать ничего хуже),’ says I.

 “ ‘Jeff,’ says he, ‘do you know that I’m a crater – a living crater?’

“ ‘That’s a self-evident hypothesis,’ says I. ‘But you’re not Irish. Why don’t you say ‘creature,’ according to the rules and syntax of America?’

“ ‘I’m the crater of a volcano,’ says he. ‘I’m all aflame and crammed inside with an assortment of words and phrases that have got to have an exodus. I can feel millions of synonyms and parts of speech rising in me,’ says he, ‘and I’ve got to make a speech of some sort. Drink,’ says Andy, ‘always drives me to oratory.’

“ ‘It could do no worse,’ says I.