Читать «"Н" значит : Надежда (поэзия)» онлайн

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I am the man of sorts, you know, And I can feel yours feelings flow, And haven't mastered mine for now... My love to you I did bestow. What was my reason for such move ? To you my love I'll never prove, For you I'm but another buff, So I am saying now - enough ! What was I thinking all that time ? You were your own, never mine, Sometimes all kind, in times all rough ... But it's still such worthless stuff. I am alone, I always was, I am still living in the doze That someone will accept my love ... I will awaken, it's enough ! I'm tired of that endless fight, I am no moth that will not bite And crawl through your endless bluff ... No more lying - it's enough ! I was the one to help you flight And threw your past out of sight, And yet it came to such a blight ... In that I'm guilty - and still right. I can forgive, I will forget Of our past that makes me sad, Such pretty looking, useless stuff... No more such memories, enough ! I have no willing to decide Of who is guilty, who is right, The separation is too tough, No more talk for now ... enough.

Я шествую сквозь дождь...

I am walking through the rain And my soul groans with pain, Cursed be the love like blain - It’s the soul’s bloody stain ! This is like the hellish rain - One without goodness gain, One with brutal, sudden end, Greatest torture of the land. I am screaming in the night, I am begging for the light - One to free me of the chain, And extinguish fiery rain, One to heal scorched heart, One to be my soul guard, One to help me understand That nowhere in earth land It is possible to find Shining love, still being blind, Golden heart, all being poor, Paradise with lifetime guar. I am passing in the night And its darkness makes me blind, And its chill touch makes me wonder Will I need those lights with thunder, Will I live that life with pain As remainder of my gain, As a token of my blight, As a sign of former might? There is no escape, no hiding From that constant essence tidying, From that endless stream of pain … No escape from hellish rain. Let it rain, I don't care ! Almost naked, soul-bare, I will stand against pain, I will bless my burning rain, I shall find way through the night, And will earn the other sight, Truly love I shall once find, On its wings I'll fly with wind. I am walking through the rain, I have thrown away the pain, I am singing in the night … Gleam in tunnel shines me bright.

Я не могу...

I can't hold my tears, My soul is on the spears, I cannot stop my mind, Tranquility can’t find. I've lost my will in space, I've sold my soul in time, I've burned my wings in race … Will peace be ever mine? I cannot hold my anger Even in times of danger, Even in times of need My spirit it still feed. I cannot find the hope - My fate is but to mope, My fate is to obey, I'm a useless prey. I cannot see the light - It is but darkest night, I've lost my right and ways To walk in sunny rays. I've lost my faith in all … Is that how we do fall? Is that how we become Ghosts in the days to come? I may not see the light, Yet I was always right - Once anger makes you blind Yours peace you'll never find. Once soul becomes a mess You will start to regress, And one day you'll become Shadow in days to come. I cannot hold my tears They came, my darkest fears - I shall not stop the mind Thus peace I'll never find...